Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
they call him Oral-B. enough said
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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