paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
