turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
