someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
Did you just see the Batmobile???
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
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