I just saw a hot homeless man
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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