You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
