Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
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