is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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