how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
