dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize
