Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
