I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize