I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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