D3 body, D1 cock
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
of course. lets lasso hookers.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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