so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
