Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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