she kept yelling 'call me bella'
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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