That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize