The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Can I color on your dick again?
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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