haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
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