Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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