So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Randomize
