I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Randomize
