haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize
