C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize