He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
I want her autograph on my taint
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Randomize
