They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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