today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize