ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
