woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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