I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
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