I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
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