Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
