I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
