I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
