this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize