I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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