there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
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