You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
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