did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
