I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Acid is not a monday night drug
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
On my way home I saw a car that had "MOVE OVER PLZ" emblazoned across the windshield backwards, so people could see it in their rearview mirror
If I ever drive for Lyft or Uber I'm definitely gonna do that
Randomize
