and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Randomize