U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
