I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
