im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Randomize
