A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Randomize
