I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Randomize
