she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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