Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Randomize
