Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Randomize
