and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
