Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize