My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Randomize